Dear Sexy Sage,
I am a 62 year old woman with a younger boyfriend who loves playing with my derriere. He has a lot of butt toys and wants me enjoy anal penetration. I have enjoyed it digitally and find it makes me come easier. I can’t help, however, from worrying about excrement and other embarrassing situations. Could you liberate how I think about it so I can liberate myself in bed?
Thanks for your perspective,
Almost Butt Happy
Dear ABH,
Thanks for such a great topic! You are indeed right that butt play can definitely increase orgasms as the female prostate gland can be very aroused by anal intercourse or penetration with fingers and/or toys. Women’s prostate gland is generally smaller than men’s and is very sensitive due to glands and ducts behind the vaginal wall. So there is a lot in this for you, Almost Butt Happy!
Here are the things I recommend: two or three towels, a paper towel or wipe, lots of water soluble lube, an empty rectum (achieved in advance by eating fruits and vegetables the day before, or a light herbal laxative, or a light enema), and a conversation with your partner in advance about the possibility of the presence of fecal matter. He (or she) should quietly be in charge of using towels or wipes and discreetly tuck soiled towels away.
Hands, fingers, dildos, butt plugs should all be very clean. Because the anal area does not produce lubrication on its own, unlike the vagina, lube is a must and copious amounts of lube will make everything better.
The other ingredients necessary during anal play are a fun attitude, alot of time and patience for exploration, and openness on both of your parts to communicating what is working and what isn’t. Most women like to start off slowly and relax before things get too heated up, in order to avoid unpleasant pain. So try to find your rhythm together and have a great time!
SS
